Bismillahirahmanirrahim
"Aku memilih untuk berada di sini bukan kerana sudah penuh ilmu untuk berkongsi apatah lagi mengajar. Tapi, kerana ada satu rasa ingin aku sampaikan kepada kalian biarpun sebesar zarah, ku harapkan redha dariNya. Penulisanku adalah sebuah penceritaan yang kadang aku tak dapat ungkapkan dengan kata-kata atau bicara. Harapanku, luah rasa dan pandanganku yang tak seberapa ini mungkin boleh kalian ambil sedikit ibrah darinya dan semoga ada pula satu semangat yang ingin ku suntikan dalam hati-hati kita biarpun sekelumit cuma."

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Allahuakbar.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

I'm leaving. 
InshaaAllah. 

So, as always, I will keep on praying for everyone.

May Allah be with all of you. 
And may Allah bless you with His Love. 

My last wish is for us to keep on turning back to Allah.
To keep on istighfar and do our taubah.
Keep on looking for His Redha.

Please don't stop doing good things.
Don't stop yourselves from holding others hand to walk with you in the path of Allah.
Don't. 

It just that, I had to leave. =.='
Something happen.

So...
inshaaAllah... shingga panjang umur, moga Allah siapkan hati ini lbih baik utk teruskan Penghijrahan diri. 
Doakan 'pemergian' saya tak lama. 

Ameen.

Assalamualaikumwarrahmatullahiwabarakatuh. 


Lots of Love,
Hajar. 



Saturday, March 23, 2013

Fear, Remorse and Love.

Alhamdulillah.

Masih diberi peluang. It's sounds so cliche kan?



But, this is what humans like us always take it for granted.
I wonder - how it feels like to have gun right on your head.

Fear.

Fear of the death.
And more horrible is to fear what will happen in our 'Next life'.

But, usually. We always deny and forget that fear.
We don't want to think about it.
We often live and breathe like we will die in the next 20 years.

We don't increase our fear to Allah.
What happen if we die right after this?

Astaghfirullah.

Everything that seems pleasant, beautiful and awesome in this Dunya
will seem Irrelevant.

Dunya - this word means 'lower life'.
Yes! True!
There is a higher life.

Where we will live eternally.
We will Never die.

Those in Jannah will live happily ever after.
Those in Jahanam will live miserably forever.

We can't come back to Dunya to undo what we have done.
We have taken every chance for granted.
We ignored Countless Warnings from Allah!

We ignored, stubborn and turn away from His Mercy.
We shut our eyes.
We deafen our ears.
And we killed our hearts.

We harden our hearts.
Those who are looking for Allah... keep on trying no matter how many times they fall.
Keep on hoping for His Redha,
will taste the Mercy of Allah that never get tired of forgiving.

I don't say that we just need to pray and do nothing.
No.

Loving Allah is not just about prayers.
Not just about Zikr.
Not just about istighfar.

In loving Him, the challenge is to live in society but the heart is with Allah swt.

Don't give up! Never. Please don't....
No matter how many sins we have committed.
No matter how many times we fall,
stand up and get back up.

Allah will see that.
And He will reward us for that...
the Most Meaningful reward is to have His Love in our hearts.

That...
until when..
We will feel so devastated to lose Him from our hearts.
Staying far from Him will make us feel sooo misery.

Ask Allah.
Make du'a now!
Istighfar and do our taubah Now.

Renew our taubah and repentance.
Let Allah know with all your heart that you really want to come back.
But, you don't know which door to be opened.

You really want to get to Him.
But you feel so difficult of leaving 'the pleasures of your nafs'.

Then, pray to Allah to make it easy.
Pray that He will guide us.
Pray that He will keep us close to Him forever.

Be thankful if you have the remorse.
I will keep on praying for all of you....
that Allah will give you the love that you are looking for.

The Love that makes you cry a lot...
the love that makes you feel so happy.
The love that makes you feel so remorseful of your sins.

Start.
Please.
I'm begging.
Please...

Oh, Allah... please open our hearts. Please open and soften our hearts. Ameen.

:(



Tuesday, March 19, 2013

IKHLAS?


Bismillahirrahmanirrahim…



Apa beza amalan riak dengan amalan Ikhlas?

Disebut oleh Ibni Rajab bin Hanbali dalam al Jawami al Kalim.

Perbezaan kedua hal ini dapat dilihat Pada Masa Amalan itu Dibuat.

1 - Kalau masa amalan itu dibuat, memang ‘lillahita’ala’ (kerana Allah)… dia banyak memberi dan banyak menyampaikan kebaikan kerana keredhaan Allah. Kemudian, datang bisikan syaitan atau datang orang….

“hg skrg bgus la aku tengok…”
“hg skrg ni dah lain oo…”

Haa… datang rasa lain macam… kacau. Rasa semacam… kata Ibni Rajab, pahala tak hilang…tapi jika riak itu naik tinggi, pahala boleh berkurang. Sebab, pada asalnya memang kita buat kerana Allah dan perasaan atau pujian orang lain datang selepas itu. Jika kita bertaubat dan minta ampun, inshaaAllah pahala itu boleh kembali. Dan inshaaAllah dilipat gandakan kerana kita berjuang untuk itu.

2 - Situasi lain – Bila kita buat amalan itu memang Bukan kerana Allah Taala.

“Aku sembahyang ni, memang nak tunjuk kat dia… biar dia tahu sikit aku selalu solat sini..

Dari awal tujuan sudah bukan kerana Allah, maka telah jatuh kepada syirik khafi. Sudah Nabi Saw bersabda : “Tidak masuk syurga seseorang yang ada sebesar zarah dalam jiwanya takabbur.”

Dan jika kita memang pernah mengalaminya, kita perlukan taubat. Keadaan ganjaran itu adalah rahsia Allah. Tapi, kemungkinan pahalanya tidaklah semacam orang yang yang betul-betul ikhlas, yang melakukan pekerjaan kerana Allah Taala. 

Tapi Allah telah berfirman yang bermaksud: “ Mereka itulah orang-orang yang jahat mereka mendapat kembali yang baik.”

Rahmatnya ALLAH Swt. Digantikan penyesalan itu dengan pahala.

Hmm, kalau nak kira rahmat Allah, sangat susah nak masuk neraka. Tu pun ramai yang msuk neraka. T_T

Degil kita lebih daripada RahmatNya.

-------------------------------



Ikhlas ini bukan perkara yang mudah. Bila kita kata ikhlas sekalipun, belum tentu kita ikhlas. Bukan mudah. Maka, ia memerlukan kita untuk Mujahadah!

Perlukan Mujahadah untuk mendapatkan keikhlasan.

Kalau nak tunggu kita benar-benar ikhlas, gamaknya ramai insan yang gagal untuk berubah. Gagal untuk bergerak ke arah kebaikan. Banyakkan berusaha untuk mendapatkan keikhlasan. Allah counts everything. Allah melihat kepada usaha dan kesungguhan kita. 

Masa zaman Imam al Ghazali, dia pernah berada dalam kedudukan yang tinggi sebagai ulama’ besar. Sehingga satu hari dia memilih untuk meninggalkan kedudukan itu dan pergi menyapu dan membersihkan masjid. Katanya… “Aku nak cari Ikhlas.”

Jadi, memang sukar. Walau apa pun, nasihat daifku… kita tetap perlu untuk teruskan perjuangan kita. Kena letakkan keredhaan Allah. Jika perlu untuk kita mendidik diri sehingga perlu meninggalkan situasi itu, buatlah begitu. Kerana itu cara Mujahadah kita untuk mendapatkan keikhlasan. Tetapi, Jangan sehingga gangguan atau bisikan syaitan itu menghentikan kita daripada berbuat kebaikan !

Keep du’a. Ask Allah to make it easy for us.

Jika perlu, beruzlah, tafadhal. =)

InshaAllah, walau apa jua keadaan, Allah Maha Mengetahui segala yang ada dalam dada kita. Dan Allah akan terus menerus memberi ganjaran dan memberi keampunan selagi kita bertaubat dan kembali padaNya. Minta pada Allah agar diberi perlindungan daripada gangguan dan bisikan syaitan dan lindungi kita daripada sifat-sifat mazmumah seperti ini. InshaAllah. 

Aku lebih suka mengingatkan diriku secara khususnya.

“Ya Allah, kurniakanlah daku hati yang khusyuk dan ikhlas hanya keranaMu.”
Amen.

p/s: rujukan Dr Asri – Hakikat Ikhlas. Wallahualam.


Thursday, March 14, 2013

Tetapkan hati demi Ilahi !!!

"Wahai orang-orang yang beriman, jika kamu menolong agama Allah, nescaya Allah akan menolong kamu (mencapai kemenangan) dan meneguhkan tapak pendirianmu."

Muhammad:7


Allahuakbar. Allahuakbar. Allahuakbar.

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...
Alhamdulillahirabbil'alamin...
Ar Rahman Ar Rahim.

Tetapkan hati kami padaMu.
Kami pohon perlindungan denganMu daripada kejahatan jin dan syaitan yang tiada henti menunaikan janji mereka menyesatkan dan melemahkan kami di jalanMu.

Wahai Tuhan Yang Maha Berkuasa atas segala sesuatu,
Engkau mengetahui segala yang ada di langit dan di bumi.
Maka, kami pohon agar tambahkan ilmu pada kami untuk berhikmah dalam membawa agamaMu.

Tak kisahlah selemah mana hati kami,
jangan jadikan kami 'biasa' dengan keburukan sehingga berasa hairan dgn kebaikan.
Jauhkan kami ya Allah apa yang indah di mata manusia dan hodoh pada pandanganMu.

Ya Rabb,
kami terlalu lemah.
Kekuatan kami hanya ada padaMu.

Kurniakanlah ia pada kami.
Berikanlah dalam kami menyusuri jalan sukar 'ini'.
Demi menuju kepada keredhaanMu

Ingatkanlah kami tentang keperitan perjuangan para Rasul yg kami rindui.
Agar kami berasa malu dengan usaha yang sekelumit ini.
hmm.

Sekalipun keikhlasan itu memerlukan pencarian ribuan tahun lagi.
Kami akan terus berjuang dan berjuang tiada rasa jemu.

Dekatkanlah kami padaMu.
Rapat-rapat.
Kuat-kuat.

Amen. Ameen ya rabbal'alamin.

Allahuakbar.
Allahuakbar.
Allahuakbar.


Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Allah takes and gives


Bismillahirrahmanirrahim....



Kadang-kadang aku perlu mengambil masa untuk  ‘menghadam’ sesuatu perkara. Subhanallah. Allah is The Most Gracious. He gave me lots of chances in my life. To do things that I love and I want to do and at the same time, He will guide me so I won’t go astray. And the most shameful part is that, I had to admit, there were times when we have done so many sins and wrongdoings and yet, Allah swt still gives us chance to repent and come back to Him.

Subhanallah.

Sama jugak. Mungkin aku terkesan banyak daripada penulisan cik Yasmin Mogahed di sini. Aku betul-betul tak sangka betapa Allah sentiasa memberi peluang supaya aku faham apa yang sedang diajar olehNya. Kenapa mesti begini dan kenapa tidak boleh begitu. MashaAllah… dan kerana untuk sedarkan aku tentang hikmahNya, Allah sampaikan daripada insan-insan lain di sekelilingku… Thank you Allah. T_T

Pada masa perkara itu berlaku, aku sangka aku lah yang melepaskannya.

Yes, I thought, I was the one who let it go. But no, subhanallah… Allah took it away.
He gave what I was asking for. I asked Allah to take it away…and out of nowhere… without any huge hit, Allah makes it happen just by giving me a little courage and strength… so that I let it go. And, Alhamdulillah… it happened. In order for Allah to take it away…. He gave me that courage to let it go. Subhanallah.

I’ve never thought that I had to go through that moment…

Kalau kamu ada baca penulisan ku yang lepas – Siapa kita masa susah? Siapa kita masa senang?, aku ada ceritakan… betapa ada masa-masa tertentu… Allah akan menutup segala pintu-pintu pertolongan supaya kita kembali padaNya.

Amazingly.. Subhanallah. Allah always does that to me. (haha. – fake laugh. Haha.)

He always does that to me. Sehingga, Alhamdulillah… bila aku rasa apa juga keadaan, daripada sekecil-kecil perkara nak cari benda hilang, sehinggalah sebesar-besar perkara melibatkan hati dan perasaan, aku hanya tahu… “Perkara Pertama aku perlu buat adalah – CARI ALLAH.”

Aku bersyukur sangat. Walaupun ada ketika aku gagal dan aku pergi selain dari Allah. Astaghfirullah… and of course, out of His Mercy, Allah will close that door. And then, I will definitely say, “ya Allah, help me!”

Kan ada masa kita rasa ‘tak best’ kan? Rasa macam tak kena ja…rasa macam, something missing… rasa serabut – padahal tak ada apa pun yang patut diserabutkan… hehe. Haa… tu lah tu. Itu Allah sedang tarbiyah la tuh. Allah sedang sedarkan kita… “Your Heart is looking for ME!”

Dan, mashaAllah…. Ada masa bila aku rasa seperti tu, aku bukak facebook mencari kalau-kalau ada lintasan nasihat daripada sahabat-sahabat di situ, bila aku tak temui, ada masa aku cari ceramah-ceramah untuk bangkitkan aku atau apa juga penulisan daripada sesiapa untuk sedarkan aku…. Sehinggalah akhirnya, aku rasa…aku tak dapat apa yang hatiku cari...ada juga untuk extreme lagi, Allah buat aku makin serabut pulok. huu...

Dan…

“hmmmm. Astaghfirullaaaahhhh halazim.”

Aku akan pasang ayat-ayat Allah yang boleh menenangkan hati tadi. Aku bukak surat cintaNya dan menemui, subhanallah begitu banyak kasih sayang Allah. Dan, Allah selalu beri aku kekuatan di situ. Rupanya bila hati rasa ‘sakit’, bukan doktor yang ada penawarnya… bukan sahabat yang ada kata-kata semangatnya… bahkan para ilmuwan hebat juga tidak boleh berkata indah. Melainkan hanya pada Allah jua kita kembali meminta!

Ya, Allah is teaching me – "Come back to ME to remake your Heart."

Dan rasanya amat selesa. T_T

Kita suka lupa siapa pemilik segalanya.

Kenapa aku kata macam tu ?

Sebab, aku selalu kesal. Teramat. Sebab, kita semua suka susahkan diri kita! We put so much burden on ourselves. We want to carry it alone. We don’t ask Allah to help us. We don’t realize our desperate need for Him. Kita suka sangat cari orang tu…cari orang ni…. Buat macam ni…buat macam tu… without coming back to Allah.

We think Allah won’t help us. We always think – “Allah is testing me and He’s gonna see how I can do!”
No! Allah is giving us the tests in order for us to Ask Him!

The test is given so that we will ask for His help. Not our parents, our friends! Not even ourselves! Allah is doing that to make us come back to Him.

Hm. Kita terlalu tenggelam dengan apa yang ada di mata. Sehingga terlupa bahawa hati kita lebih kuat penglihatannya.

--------------------------------------

Hm.

Boleh nampak tak Rahmat Allah setakat ni?

Bila kita susah, kita bergantung pada diri kita. Kita bergantung pada orang lain. Tapi bukan Allah. Jadi, disebabkan Allah itu Maha Pengasih !, Allah akan tutup segala pintu-pintu pertolongan tu supaya kita kembali padaNya.

Dan, seperkara lagi, kita semua sedia maklum. Allah itu Maha Memberi. Allah is al Wahhab. He loves to give us gifts. Tapi, apa yang berlaku?

When Allah gives us gift, we started to love that gift more than we should only love Allah.

Aku petik sikit dari Cik Yasmin – “Allah gives us gifts. But then we often become dependent on those gifts, instead of Him. When He gives us money, we depend on the money—not Him. When He gives us people, we depend on people—not Him. When He gives us status or power, we depend on, and become distracted by these things. When Allah gives us health, we become deceived. We think we will never die.”

Kita lupa bahawa semua ni hanyalah pemberian dari Allah. Dan disebabkan kita semakin cinta dan sayang segala nikmat yang Allah beri, ada masa Allah kata – “Aku kena ambik balik ni… Dia dah makin jauh dariKu!”

In that process of Losing, that we are Given! MashaAllah. Allah is The Most Merciful.

We take the gifts from Allah and we put it so deep in our heart that we are becoming so afraid of losing it! Kita terlalu sayang pada semua ini.

Kita lupa lagi kan? Kenapa Allah cipta jantung hati ? Untuk apa hati ini dicipta?

The Only reason our Heart was created is to Love ALLAH.

Dan, bila Sang Pencipta melihat hati yang dicipta olehNya mencintai dunia, maka, Dia akan mengambil dunia supaya kehilangan itu akan membuat kita sedar tentang kisah cinta kita denganNya. Subhanallah!

Dan bila cinta pada Allah sudah kembali pada tempatnya (hati kita), maka Allah berikan kembali nikmat yang pernah diambil olehNya. Dan, pada masa ni…. Hati kita sudah tidak lagi mencintai pemberian tu lebih daripada mencintai Pemberinya!



Subhanallah. Hmm.

Dan apa saja yang kita hilang, akan diberi ganti oleh Allah. Sebagaimana Musa a.s kembali bertemu ibunya, Yusuf a.s kembali bertemu ayahandanya, Hajar kembali bertemu suaminya, bahkan Ayob a.s kembali beroleh kesihatan, harta dan anaknya!

Apa saja yang Allah ambil dari kita akan diberi ganti olehNya. Jika tidak ‘di sini’, akan diganti ‘di sana’. Mungkin sama atau mungkin diganti dengan sesuatu yang jauh lebih baik untuk kita. Dan, the greatest Gift is to be close to Allah !

Hmm…aku suka ingatkan diriku lebih dari kamu semua bahawa, jangan berasa dukacita dengan perkara yang telah kita lepaskan kerana Allah Swt. Jangan berasa takut untuk lakukan sesuatu kerana Allah. Serahkan pada Allah. Yakinlah padaNya. Allah Maha Tahu apa yang dilalui, dirasai dan difikirkan oleh kita…dan Allah pasti akan menunaikan janji-janjiNya.

Sama seperti janji ini juga!……………..

“Apa yang ada disisimu akan lenyap, dan apa yang ada di sisi ALLAH adalah kekal. Dan Kami pasti memberi balasan kepada orang yang sabar dengan pahala yang lebih baik dari apa yang telah mereka kerjakan.”

(An Nahl: 96)

Subhanallah!

And, the Powerful kalimah for all these - "Inna Lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji'un" 

Sesungguhnya kami ini milik ALLAH, dan kepada ALLAH kami kembali. 



Thursday, March 7, 2013

We have forgotten: "The Storm is Coming!"


When you love someone, you do what pleases them
And your greatest joy is in pleasing and serving the one you love
It is an honor to serve the one you love

Imagine that you are in presence of a famous person
How would you act?
You would feel very happy to give him a glass of water
Or maybe just to smile at him.

You may not care about this but, you understand the sentiment here:
“There is an honour to serve the one you love”
There is Tashreef (Honour)
And it is only once that love is gone or weakened
That serving that person goes from being an honour to just being a burden

It goes from Tashreef (Honour) to only Takleef (Burden)

Sadly, our worship to Allah is Like this: “Just a Burden”

We don’t pray to seek refuge from the storm of our lives
If we pray at all, we do it to get it out of the way!
Or maybe because our parents won’t stop nagging until we do

Somehow we have forgotten that if we don’t pray
We harm No One
Not Allah!
Not our mothers!
Not our fathers!
We Harm only our Own selves!

On the Day of Judgement
Every man and woman will stand Alone in front of Allah
And there is nothing that anyone can do for you – Except by the permission of Allah
On that day a mother would be willing to throw away her own child just to save herself

Please understand,
The reality that we have forsaken!
Because we are so caught up with our phones, our apps, our friends, our parties
We are so caught up with the illusion and pleasures of this Dunnya.


Please understand,
That Ignoring the reality does not make it any Less Real
Being unprepared from something doesn’t stop it from happening

If you choose for example, to stay up all night partying or watching movies
Instead of studying for your final exam
It doesn’t mean that the final exam won’t happen
It STILL WILL!
And You only end up FAILING!
If we spend this life partying, pretending that the ‘Final’ isn’t coming,
It won’t stop ‘it’ from happening
Nothing will stop Death!

NOTHING!

NOTHING will Delay the Day of Judgment!

Like that final exam, the question is only: “Are.. We…. Prepared?”
Or are we too busy playing?

Imagine that a news reporter tells you that a Huge Storm is Coming
Imagine that you are told, unless you seek for shelter, you and your family will be destroyed
What would you do?

If we really believed that a storm was coming, we would run to shelter, right?
Only a person who didn’t Believe that forecast, would continue playing, ignoring the countless warnings
Only if you thought it was a lie,
Or you were too drunk to realize
Only if you didn’t really believe!
Or you didn’t really understand!
But how could someone know – really know – that a storm was about to hit?
And do absolutely nothing to protect themselves and those they love!
Would anyone say: “I’m actually too busy right now!”
No one would say that.

"O you who have believed, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them 
but do what they are commanded". (AtTahrim:6)


And yet, every single time,
We put off our prayers!
Put off wearing hijjab!
Put off giving up dating!
Put off abandoning smoking, alcohol or pornography!
That’s exactly what we are saying!

The fact that we cannot leave these HARAM things,
The fact that our worship has become Only a burden,
Is a sign that there is problem internally

There is a problem with our sight
We don’t really see that the storm is coming
We don’t really see the day of judgment
We haven’t purified the lump of flesh that our Prophet saw has spoke about

And as the results, the rest of our body, our actions, our lives have become corrupted
We Don’t Really See Allah with our Heart!
And we Haven’t built our Love for Him
We haven’t really used the heart for the very purpose for which it was created:
To Know, To Serve and To Love ALLAH.

Remember that the first verses revealed were not about Haram or Halal
They were about the fact that as a matter of certainty
As certain as you are reading my post now,

That you and I will meet our Maker

You and I will stand in front of Allah and will be asked:
“What did you love most in this world?”
“What did you spend your life doing?”
“What did you run after?”
“Will it last?”
The things that you chase – WILL THEY LAST?
Will they help you or will they hurt you?
When the illusion of this life has passed?

We need to come back to Allah before it’s too late
And often what keeps people from turning back
Is that they believe that their sins are too great for Allah to forgive

But to this, Allah swt speaks:

“Say O’ my servants! Who have transgressed against themselves (by sinning),

Do not despair of the Mercy of Allah,

Indeed Allah forgives all sins,

Indeed He is The Most Forgiving, The Most Merciful” (39:53)


Adaptasi dari Yasmin Mogahed - The Storm is Coming!
Ubahsuai sikit2. :(
hm.

renungkan ye.